Danger Gang! Go for it!


“Where the heck is the grappling hook?” Billy asked.

“In the duffel bag,” Judy answered.

“I’m looking in the duffel bag right now,” he said.

She looked up from polishing her magnifying glass, and said, “that’s not the duffel bag, that’s the rucksack. Gee whiz, Billy.”

“Aww shoot, Judy,” said Billy, “I sure can be dumb.”

“Don’t say that, Billy,” said Eddy, walking in through the garage door and leaning his bike against the wall, “you aren’t dumb. There’s a fine line between a duffel bag and a rucksack.”

“Gosh, Eddie, you’re right. I shouldn’t be so hard on myself. But then where’s the duffel bag with the grappling hook?”

“It’s right here,” said Mary as she walked into the garage. She put the duffel bag onto the work bench, “I took it home to polish it.”

Billy unzipped the bag and pulled the grapple from it. It shone like a chrome daisy in a gilded meadow.

“Holy moly, Mary, that sure is a sweet shine you gave it,” he exclaimed, “it’s going to look pretty swell if we have to climb anything on our adventure.”

“It sure is,” said Jimmy, rolling up on his skateboard into the garage, “great job polishing it up, Mary.”

“Thanks, Jimmy,” Mary said, “did you remember to put batteries in the flashlight?”

“I sure did,” Jimmy said, “I bought them at the hardware store.”

“Good work,” said Molly, walking her scooter into the garage, “the hardware store is a great place to get batteries.”

“It sure is,” said Timmy, cruising in on his roller blades, “I agree with Molly, great work on getting the batteries for the flashlight at the hardware store. We certainly may need it on our adventure. I brought the canteen. I filled it with water from the garden hose.”

“Gosh, Timmy, that’s a perfect way to fill up the canteen,” said Tommy, pulling up in his go-kart, “that way you don’t make a mess in the kitchen.”

“That’s right, and my parents didn’t have to scold me for making a mess because I didn’t,” said  Timmy, “did you remember the hot dogs, Tommy?”

“I sure did,” Tommy said, “my mom and I got them at the grocery store.”

“Alright, Tommy, those hot dogs will certainly come in handy on our adventure,” said Shelly as she skipped into the garage, “especially if we get hungry.”

“If we get hungry, I’m certainly going to enjoy eating a hot dog,” Julie said, climbing out of her soapbox racer, “adventures give me an appetite. I also brought the microscope.”

“Good job, Julie, ” Donny said, as he clomped into the garage in his cowboy boots, “that microscope is sure going to come in handy on our adventure. Especially if we have to look at something very small. I brought the slingshot.”

“That’s great, Donny, we may need to use the slingshot on our adventure,” said Danny, jogging in and joining them, “So I’m glad you brought the slingshot. Great work. I brought the tent. My father and I set it up last night. It works great.”

“That’s good thinking making sure the tent works great, Donny,” said Milly and she tied her pony, Featherdancer, to the fence just outside the garage, “I got the machete sharpened at the sharpener.”

“Swell stuff, Milly,” Tilly said powering down her e-bike and putting her satchel on the workbench, “The sharpener must have done a great job sharpening the machete so it’s sharp enough for our adventure. I tested the compass. The needle points North.”

“Excellent,” said Mickey, “the needle of a compass should always point North otherwise we could get lost on our adventure. Good thing you tested it to make sure.”

“Thanks, Mickey, “Tilly said, “did you bring the crossbow?”

“I sure did,” Mickey said, “I also brought arrows to go with it.”

“Gee, Mickey, that’s super smart thinking,” said Nicky leaning his dirtbike on its kickstand and opening the saddlebags, “a crossbow needs arrows to do what it was made to do, shooting arrows.”

“It sure does, “said Mickey, “did you bring the scuba gear?”

“I did,” said Nicky, “I got the oxygen tanks filled at the oxygen store.”

“Smart thinking, Nicky,” Kelly said, moonwalking into the garage, “you can’t breathe underwater, so we’ll need oxygen to breathe if we have to go underwater on our adventure.”

“We sure will,” Kerry said, landing her mini-blimp, tethering it, and entering the garage, “did you bring the fanny pack, Kelly?”

“I sure did,” Kelly said, “did you bring the comb, Kerry?”

“Yes,” answered Kerry, pulling the comb from her pocket, “we can put it in the fanny pack.”

“We sure can,” said Wally, strutting into the garage, “and we can put the cigarettes in it, too.”

“Hey, that’s great, Wally, that you got the cigarettes,” said Kerry, “the fanny pack is a perfect place to put the cigarettes for our adventure.”

“It sure is, they’ll fit perfectly in the fanny pack,” said Sherry as she goose-stepped into the garage, “and those cigarettes are the brand we all smoke, so that’s great that you got that brand for our adventure.”

“I know,” Wally said, “that’s why I got that brand, because we all smoke it. Did you bring the ranch dressing, Sherry?”

“I sure did,” Sherry said, “I went to the grocery store and got some.”

“That was super smart of you to go to the grocery store to get the ranch dressing,” Wally said, “because that’s the kind of store that has ranch dressing. Great work.”

“And if we have to have a salad on our adventure that ranch dressing will come in super handy,” Lizzy said, hopping off her pogo stick, “because you put ranch dressing on salad.”

“You sure do, Lizzy,” said Petey, hanging his toboggan up from the hook on the wall inside the garage, “I hope you brought the pregnancy test for our adventure.”

“I definitely brought the pregnancy test, that way we can test to see if anyone gets pregnant on our adventure,” Lizzy said, “especially if we orgy gang bang it nasty style on our adventure.”

“You said it, Lizzy, “said Petey, “banging orgy nasty gang style on adventures is something we should definitely be prepared for. That’s why I brought the snakeskin rug.”

“What a great idea, Petey,” Billy said, “if the gang nasty bangs orgy style on our adventure then we will totally need that snakeskin rug. This is going to be one heck of an adventure.”

They all gathered in the centre of garage, joining hands in a circle of team power. They raised their heads and hearts to the heavens above, and sang, “PREPARATION!”




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